First day of winterleague!

Im rather fine with my team. Its quite a different experience this year as compared to being under Raphael. But I look forward to games afterwards cuz I feel that theres quite alot of potential here and there. And after like quite a long hiatus my stamina really deproved alot so I think I have to do more vigorous PT.

Tmr's the last day of A levels, something that we have really looked forwards to. I asked Dayong if he sighed a breath of relief after his last paper was collected, he said he did not, and instead he felt like theres nothing much to do after it.

Ive drawn this list of things to do after A levels. According to my past experiences, it never worked. Ive picked up maple again thx to py but I hope that at least this time I have more control over my gaming hours.

Did 3 MCQs today, hoped its enough. Ill really feel devastated if tmr's MCQ is too hard and I didnt do well. Regret wasting the week away (technically its not wasting but w.r.t studying its quite a waste).

I went back for training after a long long time. My skin got so allergic to the grass that Im feeling the random itch and needle poking feeling all round my body. Its super fustrating.

Anyway training was totally hot(literally). I ran like only 3 rounds on the grass and it was already so tiring. All those mugging really drained stamina. And it didnt end just there cuz after that we went to PS to eat and talk at Istana Park (which was hot and humid). But it was quite fun la.

Whilst most people went home, I went to find Quek Eld Kj Xj to watch some movie called The Informant. Before that, dinner at some retarded "cafeteria" was expensive and disgusting. (Soft shell crab with mash potato below --- they make it sound like some pasta). I never liked western food.

Ok then now about the movie, it was so boring that I dont think anyone would watch it so I shall not hide any spoilers. The comedy show made the audience laugh 5 times during the 2 hours. For the first 20min no one knew whats going on (maybe those critics who rated the show 4.5 did know whats going on), Quek slept, Eldwin played his Itouch, Kkj looked like hes dying, Xj desperately trying to laugh. I was so bored I started pulling out the rubber string of my pants (the one that tightens the pants alot but dont worry pulling it out doesnt affect the tightness of the pants actually). Ok la there were like 5 funny parts, of which 2 I felt were exceptionally funny SOLELY BECAUSE they are relatively funnier than anything else in the show so after like dreadfully mundane scenes finally when something is actually funny it would be quite amplified.

Im so guilty I wasted (wasted, not spent) alot of money today, because lunch wasnt very nice and dinner sucked and the movie was inspirationally boring. At least the day was spent out, which is something I havent done in quite a long time.

Grass allergy gahh.

Walao its the first time I take such a big exam (PSLE not counted because I was too young to realise the importance of it then) and the kind of stress I rly never feel before. Other times its always the mindset of screw up nevermind la, try my best can liao, not A levels anyway. Buts now its the real thing!!! ): ): ):

Lucky I got mousehunt to accompany me..

And I think thats it not cool at all when people go around saying they dont mug and they are slacking because:

1) If they are actually mugging its being hypocritical

2) If they arent it just means they are too "immature" to realise the importance of A levels

So for people like that, pls dont go around telling people you're not mugging cuz no one gives a damn.

(This is hidden to show that no offense intended)

Haha heres a super funny joke I heard:

A cop pulls Heisenberg over for speeding.
The cop asks "Do you have any idea how fast you were going?"
"No but I know exactly where I am"

Hahaha!

Linus is right ~ if we screw up our A levels it doesnt mean that we will be stricken in poverty forever. Not that its an excuse not to study, because not everyone is given an opportunity to study and take the A levels (which will presumably help us achieve what we want more easily). But its good to see the line when we prioritize things. Are activities that we want to do mutually exclusive with regards to the A levels? Seems to me that everyone now is saying "wait till A lvls end then _ _ _".

But what if we never got the chance to do what we want after A levels? What if in the process of waiting you've lost something that is much more valuable than that imprinted certificate.

Mr How is right ~ Its not the end of the world if we screw up the 'A' levels. In fact I think that if I actually do screw it up, life MIGHT get more interesting in a way (not that its interesting in the positive way) but definitely it wouldnt be mundane and boring.

Post-prelims was wonderful. At least for yesterday and today (:

For yesterday I watched surrogate and time traveller's wife. The latter was better, the former wasnt as good as it seemed but it was still a movie worth catching (:

Today frisbee ppl finally met up haha its been long since we had such fun (:

Cant wait for the photos to be uploaded!

Yay

I dont feel the motivation to study chem at all. It felt so different from last year. Tells so much what passion could do and what lack of it would do. I no longer see the point in studying and memorising those facts. Its like studying lost its purpose. It feels like Im just studying chem for the grade and its absolutely so dreadful.

I wonder why Ive lost interest in this topic, where it used to be my favourite/best-did subject in secondary school.

Do I blame the teacher? Or do I blame the nature of the topic? Or do I blame myself.

Fractious.

Confident yet not
Hopeful frowned thoughts
Time is a scarce
Yet if not, will us?

A better tomorrow
Or prolonged sorrow
A smoother path?
Or journey more rough?

For finally we realise
that knowledge we theorise
Chopped in black and white
What for we fight?

So far ahead
So near's thy' bed
And before thy slip into dreamland
Think again: Why do thy give a damn?

This morning I woke up and I realised that prelims is very very close. It also suddenly dawned upon me its importance and blablabla.

On a sidenote, its almost 2 weeks (or even more? oh I lost count) that Im in the lagoon trying to catch a hydra mouse that drops blueprints. Its just waves and waves of disappointment (YEA WAVES [pun 1]). And then I wondered if I should continue using dehydration base (SALT HYDRAlysis [punS 2]).

Omgwtf I feel like an idiot writing such lame puns.

Anyway the point is, I wonder, if in life, after facing much disappoints, would we still have hope that one day things would turn out right? Or would our hopes be crushed so frequently that we could not differentiate it from despair?

Oh, speaking of differentiating, I should start on it soon (:

My mum juz called to tell me my brother has got H1N1 (pls dont panic) but hearing it now wouldnt be as traumatising as hearing it weeks ago. But seriously man, Im finally getting better (alto theres these random instances of fever, quite mild, but well its still fever thats why I didnt go to school again today) and then tadah, I risk being unable to go back to sch again tmr. Dam its not the type of holiday I would like ._. Resting at home doing nothing at all. Few days ago I asked the doctor if I might have got H1N1 since I got unrelenting fever, he say shouldnt be, cuz if it fluctuates then its not, and even if it is, its so common alr theres nth to worry about. So I hope I wouldnt have to be quanrantined such that when I feel fine I can go back to school alr. Not like friday's lessons are of any interest to me, but it juz feels so wrong to be at home all this week.

I dont know if I should be doing hw at all, it makes my fever come back and Ill get headache. Thermoscan is now my new friend because its been digging into my earwax (just means ive been taking temp consistently) for the past few days every now and then. 

Few min ago Ive decided to just srsly heck about studies for now. Ive been doing quite alot the past few months and its time I took abit of a break. Like just heck it la. Think about it in a long run, who gives a _____ about A level certs. Just gonna get my into Uni, and if I dont manage to get into one, Ill just go poly and earn $$$ earlier. Aiya but on a brighter side its just a few days of stagnancy (I Hope).

Ive been lying on the bed for 3 days with a fever and all I do is ---(sleep wake up, eat, eat medicine)n---. Its something like a repeating polymer chain. Im lagging behind the syllabus (yea, thats the thing I worry alot, especially when Im not suppose to worry, but everytime I try to sleep, the thought of the amount of stuff I have to do after that makes it harder to sleep), and Ive not been in sch for 2 days. And Ive missed PE on Tuesday (which is rather regretful). But on the brighter side, Ive realised the importance of writing a will (: (just in case anything happens).

I hope Ill fully recover by tmr (means no more fever tonight) so that I could go to school.

National day celebrations were quite ok. Choir never failed to make ppl go high. And I really think that the old national day songs are very nice and uplifting. Maybe because we've heard it since young, but nevertheless it beats the too modernistic songs.

After that went to watch movie with the class. I got abit disappointed when the class had to split up for lunch just because some people got their adamant opinions about food. Personally Im fine with anything la, but I think like once in awhile when we go out as a class its better if we be more shui bian and just eat anything that satisfies most ppl. Like theres people who cannot eat beef and people who just couldnt spend much money, so it was quite lame when we split up to Carls Jr and Burger King (both are beefy and ex). Anyway, personally I think food court is good la, cheap and so much variety.. everyone could just eat what they want and not pay so much.

Den after that watched Hangover. Aiya its a screwed up movie lol (under-rated like literally, shouldnt be NC-16). But quite funny at some parts alto like the funniness is cancelled out by some gross scenes. Haha after that everyone went home den I went to find Quek Kj Xj Eld. We ate Sakae buffet which was quite expensive, but at least it wasnt beefy and its nice. Haha but the thing worth the $$$ wasnt the food, it was like the fun and stuff. Nvm cannot say too much here, but it was good haha.

Ya den aft that went to Vivo rooftop to talk about life but obviously centered around life of guys at this age, it more or less about girls. Had a good laugh about some stuff and I was taking lots of scenery photos for my laptop wallpaper. Ok it was a rather good day (:

Today morning woke up at 11 and den slept again from 2-5.30. I think Im slacking too much. But well, we all need breaks.

~~~

I realised this is the first time I tagged a post under friends. Most of the other times it is under life, studies or frisbee. I think it applies to many others too, we tend to be worried too much about tangible stuff like achievement (esp A lvl results at this point in time) dat we forget that we have belittled our relationships with others. 

LOL.

Many people are like complaining about studying and how unsuccesful they are in studying and how they cant concentrate and how this june 'holiday' sux because we've got to study and how unmeaningful their life has became.

And although I admit, truthfully speaking, that Im also annoyingly stressed over my studies and progress, Id like to myself about something I guess we've all forgotten.

Studying, although boring, mundane, fustrating, is a privilege. Ive been to work, and in 2 weeks, Ive already succumbed to the fact that school life beats working life. And after being to Taiwan and India, Im glad to say that the education in Singapore (despite its flaws and academic nature), is a gift we've always taken for granted. Forceful mugging has helped us understand more things we perceive in our world, and there just so many other people around the globe that yearn to be where we are today. To be in school. 

Amidst our very comfortable life, I hate to say, we are oblivious to some of the discomforts that plague the world. We compare more, complain more, compete more, but comform less. We seem to not understand why we are being taught what we are taught. We are excessively pessimistic and sometimes unecessarily over critical.

Anyway, I feel that studying hard is important, but it shouldnt be too torturous. If not, logically speaking, realistically and practically thinking, do you think you can absorb information effectively when u feel exhausted? Your brain says "NO! go and sleep/play/slack" while you force yourself to understand the fundamental laws of circular motion. Im acerbic about the effectiveness of studying excessively, because afterall, you might just be going around in circles.

Quality > Quatity.

Im having a backache because Ive been studying (ok more like doing homework) all day long. And of course, clicking mousehunt simultaneously.

Surprisingly, I got to revisit a principle of life through mousehunt, and thats got to do with ambitions/greed. So here is how it went. Theres this mouse called the Eagle Owl mouse which is supposedly one of those expensive mouse that people love catching. A month ago, it was still considered rare for my case, but today, it became something rampant (because I went from calm clearing map to great gnarled tree). Ok pardon the details, but the point Im trying to make is, although this mouse is still much more than the other common mice, the feeling that it has became rampant, makes catching it, not that "joyous" anymore. And this closely ties in, coincidentally, with what I was talking to Daryl about -- jobs and life. I feel that many times, in our lives, we pursue our ambitions, our dreams, but when we got it, most of the times (I must highlight, most of the times not all of the time) we start to take it for granted, and gradually, it doesnt mean that much to us as compared to when we first "dreamnt" of it.

And this boil down to one crucial point. Are the things we want, really the things we want? Afterall, at the end of the road, did we made the right choices? Did we leave any regrets? I feel that making the right choice or not doesnt matter that much, afterall, we always make the choice we think are better (no one's stupid enough to self-pwn). But whether it turns out to be the better choice, that depends. And when it doesnt, we regret. Regret is something really excruciating. It gives us the feeling of helplessness, the feelign that you could have done it, but you didnt. That kind of feeling.

But regrets teaches us lessons. Although sometimes, its too late.

Often we see the sad and ugly side of life, and we rarely recognize the happy moments. Until recently, I tried to really appreciate what I have, and what Ive done. And fortunately, it made me treasure my life more. However, I must admit that sometimes, when we finally feel that life is so precious, we start to fear of losing it. And that might be another factor that, ironically, cause us to make really bad choices (as highlighted in Star Wars).

Anyway, I still think that many many things boil down to luck and circumstance. Afterall, we humans have our limits to what we can do.

Summer league today played so little... felt very sian loh. But then I realised our dear j1s played even less last week so Im rather satisfied. Anyway, the point is, after that we had some mass dinner at Suntec pepperlunch. We reached at like 6 since they said 530 meet and the rest came at 7. Wait for 1 hour leh (although it didnt feel that long). Anyway pepper lunch is quite nice cuz quite long never eat liao.

Ive been thinking alot today, and haii. Incoherent. Some other day Ill try blogging again (:

H3 is finally over, but H2 isnt. Back to mugging, back to reality.

The road goes on.

I juz backspaced quite alot of words cuz I feel incoherent and weird blogging in livejournal.

Anyway, its the end of h3 tmr (: 3 hour paper straight, Im juz worried I have nothing to write (well who isnt). Actually I dont rly hate h3 at all, only that I dont like exams. Academics are actually quite interesting if there isnt exams. Oh but well, without exams it wouldnt be called academics it would be Science.

Actually I think Science isnt the way to explain our universe (like duh). Its just the most well-crafted way. Like aiya dunno how to say. I read some stuff on biocenterism and it makes quite some sense but ironically its quite scientific but whatever. Well I admire scientists who love writing research papers and indulge in mind-numbing work, but thats not my type of thing haha.

Its weird why Im in such a cheery mood when I prognosticate that I cant sleep well tonight. And life is getting stressful anyway.

Recently (not that recent) my mum bought some laminated written cool chinese saying, quite inspirational. It goes:

说了又不听
听了又不懂
不懂又不问
问了又不做
做了又做错
错了又不认
认了又不改
忍了又不服
不服又不说

And if you realise, it starts in a cycle again (:

Hi all,

Ive decided to switch to LiveJournal! (: